it's funny. im feeling so down right now cos of yu. yet, the only person whom i want by my side right now, lifting me out of this hole is yu. and i know it'll never happen. why can't i tell myself its all not worth it? why do i keep thinking yu're worth every bit of my time and love? why cant i see it the way others do? why i can't i see yu not bothering about me and tell myself thats enough to make me move on? i try. i really do.
i woke up from a really disturbing dream. about yu. my dream was a reflection of reality. i wanted yu back in my life so badly but yu kept pushing me away. kept telling me its never gonna be possible. and i know how true that was. i woke up in the morning and cried. cos it was so real. it was real. its the truth. i didnt have a good sleep at all. i kept dozing off at every opportunity i had. just cos of the dream. :(
ive decided. not to go for anymore class gatherings in a long time. cos i know it'll make me upset looking at how he would talk to the rest of the girls and avoid me. we shared so much and its come to nothing now. sigh. and it would not make it awkward for everyone else. and they dont have to keep asking me how im doing.ill spare yu guys the agony. i just gotta be away from things that will hurt me. im protecting myself.
it hurts all over again.
time, thats what i need. loads of it.
i woke up from a really disturbing dream. about yu. my dream was a reflection of reality. i wanted yu back in my life so badly but yu kept pushing me away. kept telling me its never gonna be possible. and i know how true that was. i woke up in the morning and cried. cos it was so real. it was real. its the truth. i didnt have a good sleep at all. i kept dozing off at every opportunity i had. just cos of the dream. :(
ive decided. not to go for anymore class gatherings in a long time. cos i know it'll make me upset looking at how he would talk to the rest of the girls and avoid me. we shared so much and its come to nothing now. sigh. and it would not make it awkward for everyone else. and they dont have to keep asking me how im doing.ill spare yu guys the agony. i just gotta be away from things that will hurt me. im protecting myself.
it hurts all over again.
time, thats what i need. loads of it.
lifted a burden off her shoulders @ 1/18/2006 01:36:00 am | Put your comment here
